Nice funeral

So my friend Zelle passed away. I have known her and her husband for 27 years. They have been in my home every month for the past 8 years. (almost every month).

I went to her funeral today. It was a very sweet funeral. Very nice. Very sad. I still can't wrap my head around the fact she is gone. I only talked to her on the phone a couple weeks ago.

But she went to church last Sunday, she seemed fine -- and then she went home and dropped dead of a heart attack in a blink of an eye. I had a feeling something was up because I walked past her house on Sunday after church and there were a ton of cars there.

She's the "matriarch" of a HUGE family. Her husband, has aged ten years in the past week. He looked so lost and forlorn. Very, very sad. It would not surprise me if he also leaves this life in the near future. That happens a lot... when a spouse goes. But actually, in our ward, it doesn't. So I guess I shouldn't say that. We have a lot of widowers in the ward who have survived their wives by several years.

I thought my dad would go soon after my mom. But she has been gone for 4 years and he's still here. He's too ornery to die anyway. LOL.

When I attend funerals, I always find myself planning my own. (I know that sounds depressing and maudlin, but really it's not). I'm going to die someday. That's a given. And I'd actually like to have the kind of funeral "I" want -- because I will be there, watching. I have no doubt.

I want my funeral to be fun. By that I mean... I want a lot of laughter. I guess I better write all my thoughts down sometime and give to my kids so they have them.

I want my life "celebrated." I don't want my death mourned. I know I'm going to a better place. And I will still be me.