I miss my hubby....

I created this montage from pics of us and our smiley gallery. Set it to music.

I miss my George. But he may not be gone as long as expected. The end... may be near. :-)

Metamorphisis

Ok, so my husband and I will be apart for a little while. It's a fact of life. One I can't change.

He misses me as much as I miss him.

Gas is going up. Food is going up. Taxes are going up. Economy is going down. Wars abound. People get sick and die. Children get hurt and cry. Dope addicts are rampant. Thieves break into people's homes WHILE THEY ARE THERE. Foods are full of pesticides, leaders hand out genocide. Politicians scam us all. Making promises that fail. Who do you trust anymore? How can we dare to answer our door? I don't. People knock and I hide.

I live in a world of chaos. Secret societies. Nothing is as it seems. Even the most fundamental things get all twisted up so you don't know what is what anymore. My anxiety level has SHOT through the roof. Haven't been this bad in a long time.

So, George and I had a wonderful talk (well several of them) and he keeps telling me to just hang in there. Focus on the family. Focus on work. Focus on the Word of God. Shut the world out and create my own haven. And look forward to when we can be together again. (He says it's the last time he's going to work on the islands).

I woke up the other morning and realized several things. 1. I had gained a TON of weight. 2. I needed to change that.

So, I'm going to be alike a catepillar and go into my cocoon and soon transform into a beautiful butterfly.

I have so much to be thankful for. My children are awesome. All of them. I love them dearly.

They are smart, talented, kind, loving, generous. I could not have asked for better. I hit the jackpot.

MY BMW

Lest you can't guess what "BMW" stands for.... it's b*tch, moan and whine.

I will feel better after I let this out.

So.... ok..... I sold some stock last year and got hit HARD by the tax man. To the tune of a couple THOUSAND. Yet, I don't even feel like I got to enjoy ANYTHING from that transaction!! And now what I had sitting in my savings account gets to go to Uncle Sam. Damn.

Oh, and Utah just passed a bill to DOUBLE the sales tax on food. This is going to impact the poor who can barely afford food anyhow. I'm thinking I better get used to living on beans and rice.

And then today I noticed my front tire is going flat. Oh how convenient!

And my rent is getting raised.....

and on and on and on............. I see money just swirling down a huge toilet bowl hole.... glug, glug, glug.

Had to fork out almost $100 for David to take the ACT test and enroll in concurrent enrollment. Plus his driver's ed. And his weekly driving assignments use up gas.... which is now $3.30 per GALLON.

I need to get a cyst removed from my wrist and another epidural in my neck..... (several hundred out of pocket there).

And my husband is far far far away................................................

I hate it when I feel all stressed out.

Phooey

I thought selling stock was supposed to be a good thing. Huh.

Not when the government gets half of it.

What a crock.

I'm peeved.

Whatever. Grrrr.

Paradise... here I come!!!

These are photos of Oahu. Can't wait to go. I love the islands. Looking forward to this trip is what will help me keep my sanity. It's so hard to be apart again. And the 3 hour time difference is really hard especially when I go to bed early. Leaves us no time to talk.

I get up at 6am.... so it is 3 am where George is. When I eat lunch at 11:00, he is working. I get off work and he is getting back from lunch. I go to bed at 7 or 8 and he's still working!

It's going to get worse in a couple weeks when we change our clocks ahead one hour. Then we will be 4 hours apart because Hawaii doesn't change their clocks.

Well, being depressed is taking it's toll on me. I just eat and sleep. So I am getting fat again.

This weekend I will consume everything that is a temptation to me to the point that I will never want it again.... and then I start my diet on Tuesday.

And it's time to pull out the exercise dvds again.

And start tanning. I always feel so much better when I tan.

Hehehe when George sees me again... he's not going to recognize me. :-)

Three letters that spark fear.......

This Wednesday, Thursday and Friday we have an FDA audit. They always cause a bit of a panic because our company depends on FDA approval for our products. We do the best we can and we really try hard to comply to everything we need to. And we usually pass just fine. But it always makes everybody a bit tense and cranky and stressed out when it's coming up.

You never know if you are going to get a "nice" auditor or a "picky" one.

There are rules we have to follow in our conversations with auditors. And some of those rules are really difficult to remember. Especially when you're nervous and you're trying to make a good impression. You tend to "chat" and that's not a good thing.

Hopefully it all goes well. I have confidence it will.

Georgie is in Oahu. I haven't talked to him. He got in after I was already sound asleep. I imagine we'll get to talk tonight. Three hour time difference stinks. Three thousand miles apart stinks.

oh well.

ONE DAY AT A TIME.

Good news!

My "sister" had a brain scan and "Bob" (that's what she named her tumor) is GONE and no new tumors have taken up residence.

This is GREAT!!!!

Also.... her mammogram showed NO CHANGE from last year.

And her tumor markers in her blood work have dropped way down.

AND -- she got reinstated on her clinical trial chemo drug Iniparib.

All great news!!!